The story behind Chonniu and Chuben.

The thing about Chonniu is that it’s such a cute nickname yet again created by the one and only Chuben (my girlfriend la).

It’s not the first time she’s done this.

First it was Blubber, because blubber is what keeps the seals and walruses up in the Antartica warm and cozy; and, somehow Chuben seemed to have thought that it suited me. She must have referred to my college tummy, although it was significantly smaller than what it is today. She used to think it was comfortable. It still is now. Maybe, even more comfortable now!

But, it’s nice to know that it keeps her warm like actual blubber. She keeps me even warmer too, with all her tight hugs. I have never liked it when our hugs end, but she knows that if each hug is to remain special and unique to each moment, it has to be brief. Thankfully, the feeling that lasts is the opposite.

Second nickname that she spontaneously created was Chubs… I think. It’s amazing how all these nicknames just pop out like mushrooms in a dense rainforest. What’s the origin of Chubs? I’m not sure. Shall we move on?

Third nickname that I can recall was, Shaunnie. Well, self-explanatory.

Fourth nickname was Bubs. To really understand the term ‘Bubs’, you first need to understand the complete definition of ‘Chubs’. I think I can explain what it really means now. ‘Chubs’ was derived from the word ‘chubby’, and according to the Law of Hsu-Ven’s Special List of Nicknames, you must deliberate over which letters are unnecessary. Or, to your whims and fancies, remove random letters and hope it sounds good.

However, that only applies if you have mastered and fully comprehended the Theory of Crafting Nicknames (written by Chuben Wong. View her article on Google Scholar for free). 

After substituting the letters ‘b’ and ‘y’ for the letter ‘s’, you get ‘Chubs’.

But, how about Bubs? Just apply the damn Law of Hsu-Ven’s Special List of Nicknames, damn it! Stated in Article 4, page 1103243109121308 of the Law:

One must be creative with the size of letters.

The explanation: make the letter ‘C’ smaller, rotate it 90 degrees anti-clockwise, and use it to fill in the gap in the letter ‘h’. Hence, you get a ‘b’. 

The result: Bubs. 

Last but not least, we have arrived at relatively well known ‘Chonniu’. How did the girlfriend do this? First, you have to look at ‘Chonniu’ as two separate entities: ‘Chon’ and ‘Niu’.

‘Chon’ is derived from Shaun; ‘Niu’, from Liew. TA-FREAKIN-DA! I believe the nickname ‘Chon’ was given by a friend named Lydia back in college. Lydia really liked us as a couple. “Chon and Chuan” she would say.

Now, how do you get Chuben?

Same thing! ‘Chu’ is derived from ‘Hsu’; ‘Ben’, from ‘Ven’. TA-DA!

It’s amazing how Chuben always comes up with new nicknames. I love her. A lot. 

Keep calm and dig out your friend’s embarrassing moments

Wouldn’t it be pleasant to feel so tired at the end of the day, because you laughed so much throughout it? What a happy thought.

It’s not always this easy. When you have so many things going on, all at once. That’s when it hits you hardest, and you struggle to cope with the pace of every thing that’s happening. Studies, and extra-curricular activities. Both good and bad can come out of this. Good, is when everything turns out fine at the end; bad, when you start worrying about everything before the end.

This week will be hectic, and I’ll need to pull through it eventually.

How?

You laugh about the ridiculous photos that your friends posted back in 2008 on Facebook, you cringe at the spelling errors/MSN messenger short forms that they put up on their status updates, and you go to Andrew’s profile to find evidence of his previous experiments of using Adobe Photoshop.

His 1980s hair is hilarious. So are Zaim and Irene’s selfies, Chealsea’s undesirable return to skul, and Amir’s confusion as a result of his interest in things that contradict each other.

“WTH?” Amir expressed his frustration.

I see this thing where you dig out everyone’s embarrassing moments and publicising them emerge as a ‘thing’, a new trend, a headline whore.

 

 

Have a class in 7 hours

Went downstairs, played Cards Against Humanity with the guys, laughed our asses off, ordered Lucky’s salt & pepper chicken wings WITH chips. Salty, spicy chips stir-fried with chicken wings, onions, dried chilli and peppers. Who would have thought that this combination would actually work?! Who would have thought!

Checked my timetable. Turns out class doesn’t start at 12 p.m. but at 11 a.m. That’s a huge difference. Don’t know if I will be able to sleep soon because I’m as stuffed as a turkey during Thanksgiving. Overall, supper was good but thought I should have had 3 or 4 more chicken wings in the delivery bag.

I feel cheated.

Inspirational life quote from Shrek is love, Shrek is life. :

“I am ready. I spread my ass cheeks for Shrek.”

Don’t you feel motivated to live life now? Of course you don’t, stupid.

 

having a tad too much to drink

When someone has a tad too much to drink, you know how people say things like “He’s not going to remember this when he wakes up”? Well, I had a drink or two too much yesterday; but, I remember everything clearly.

I remember, when the first few drinks came along. Zhane brought some red wine to the housewarming, and Hau Wei opened the bottles for us like the seasoned partygoer he secretly it. We poured it for everyone in the house, and the party shifted its gear from dinner to drinks. Those plastic cups seemed innocent. A few minutes later, a pleasant buzz sneakily replaced my worries and concerns. It felt good. Slightly lightheaded, but good.

I remember, when 1 to 2 drinks transformed into 5 or 6. We started downing them like there was no event at 3 p.m. the next day that I had to be in charge of, because not worrying feels like the best thing someone could ever indulge in. Especially when you have a lot to carry on your shoulders, it felt good to let go of that weight even if it was just for an instance. We got Andrew to down some wine, and that whisky, and then vodka. *cue Krish’s “WOAAAAAAAAAAAH”

He got really red, and so did I (like the lobster I am). My head at this time, was really really light.

I also remember, that my cheeks hurt because I was smiling too much. Also, three people took videos of me. You… sons of bitches. Joking. Please don’t post it up on Facebook, or you’ll die. I kid you notPhotos are fine though!

I remember, everything in the living room was comfortable. Everything was like a bed to me. Not just any bed, but the softest and most cushy of all the beds ever produced in this world. First, there was the cold and soothing wall beside the television. Then, there was the couch. After that, it was Adre’s shoulders and Zhane’s. Then, back to the couch. Finally, my bed.

Most importantly, I remember how my friends helped me. They gave me water, they asked me if I was okay, they gave me more water to drink, a few plastic bags and even threw them away once I was done using them. Some even tried to clean the carpet! Once they put me into bed, they came in and checked on me several times before leaving, and even opened the window for me so that the room doesn’t become too warm and stuffy. How amazing!

I am so thankful. Thanks, everyone. It was a memorable night.

lalalala

Had breakfast immediately after I woke up (took a shit before that la).

Boiled the water, put two eggs in.

Bring out my heavy ass wooden chopping board I bought from Ikea for about 13 quid (worth it), and began slicing oranges.

Zaim asked why didn’t just eat them from the skin itself, as normal people would do. Told him my teeth were sensitive, which reminded me to charge my electric toothbrush. Really love using the electric toothbrush, makes my teeth feel squeaky clean.

Back to breakfast…

Sliced the oranges into small chunks and put them into a ball. Added some good ol Dorset Muesli (the one with loads of raisins, dried apricots, and dried pears).

“HERE COMES THE MILK” 
“NOOOOOOOOO,” the orange slices, dried fruit and oat flakes screamed for their lives as the milky mixture engulfed them.

This is more like a notebook la btw

Other than the definitions of Quell and Misgivings, I learnt two new things today:

1) Market Breadth, which determines whether a market is more bullish or not by analysing the number of companies advancing in relative to companies declining

2) Floating-Rate Notes, that is a debt instrument that protects investors against rising interest rates. How? I’m not so sure now.

UPDATE: I understand it now, thanks to this website; but not this website.

That’s What Shaun said recently hit the 200-like mark. It’s not an accurate measure of anything really, but at least I know more people are viewing the status updates created by the team.

If you’re wondering what TWSS is, it’s just another way to read the news. As I like to make things more understandable (out with the heavy jargon!), I thought that I could do the same with news stories. People often want to read and gain more knowledge of the world they’re leaving in, but it can be quite tough at times.

That’s What Shaun Said is a step towards making it easier for everyone. Check it out!

Moving in is tough la

Hello humans,

Settling into your new accommodation is difficult. You want to go to bed, but the mattress cover just does not fit the dusty mattress. You want to sleep longer, but you wake up at 6.30 a.m. after falling asleep around 2 a.m. the night before. You want to eat a solid breakfast, but all there is available at 9 a.m. is just the Curry Maggi packet you brought over from home and some hot water.

Speaking of hot water, guess what I used to boil the water? That’s right! A gas stove (while most people are stuck with that slow ass induction cooker installed in their flats or apartments).

It’s weird to have no drawers in your wardrobe. It’s also quite weird that your study desk is not equipped with any drawers. Come on la. With hope that Ikea will have what I need to make my room super need, I also hope that it won’t be full of people. 10 a.m. sounds like a healthy time to reach the place, because that’s when it opens.

You know what else happens at 10 a.m.? Rise of the drunken idiots, plodding along to class.

This is an extract of an actual conversation between said idiots:

“So what did you do last weekend?”
“I got soooo drunk at this club…(continues to speak about how (s)he would never do it again, and then does it again the next day)”

fin.

Three more days until I fly off.

10.9

In two weeks, I will be flying back to Leeds. As I am writing this, the little boy in front of me is impatiently waiting for his Styrofoam packets of Char Siew and Siu Yok rice. Swaying from side to side with a RM50 note in his hand, he continually peeks over the counter to check if the dishes he ordered to tapau is done. The intensity of his sways peaked, and then stopped as the lady handed him his plastic bag full of styrofoam packets.

He entered a car driven by his mother and they left. I did not like the way she parked, as she was slightly too close to the Alza on her right. My Alza.

It’s close to 2 p.m.

It feels so nice to have lunch alone at Uncle Yap’s Char Siew in Kota Kemuning. It’s peaceful. Customers, not many. Food, tasty and simple. Songs being played, Stay Away From Me by Secondhand Serenade.

What will one do without Char Siew and Siu Yok?

#VisitKotaKemuning2014 #TourismKemuning #KotaKemuningTrulyAsia

21.9

In three days, I will be flying back to Leeds. As I am writing this, there’s a lady writing down her orders on a piece of paper. Beside her, a family is having their late lunch. A mother, a father, and their two little girls. The parents are busy engaging with the lifeless devices in their hands, while the little girls are busy trying to get their attention. Technology, no doubt, gets us connected with millions in this globalized, heavily interconnected world; but too often it disconnects us with the ones physically closest to ourselves.

How many times have we seen a large group of friends at a restaurant, instead of engaging in face-to-face conversations, tap their fingers away on the latest Instagram photos and most viral Facebook updates?

Is the answer ‘too many’?

6.9: That awesome French restaurant called Yeast

Screen Shot 2014-09-10 at 3.51.33 PMWas supposed to attend a forum that I signed up for today but really, I’ve had enough of them; and also because time spent with Chuben > time spent at a forum.  

Had an awesome lunch at Yeast in Bangsar.

The restaurant was cozy in its own unique French way and one of the owners even came around a few times to check on how we were doing. 

“Have a nice brunch”. “Mm that looks good. Is everything alright?” Très bien.

Also, from the fact that most of the food being served revolved around bread, to its checkerboard tiles on the floor, would make one who has visited Paris nostalgic.  

The Chuben and I sat at the bar, which gave us a bird’s eye’s view of the kitchen’s operations. The chefs and waiters constantly played around and joked about anything and everything during the rush hour, but remained professional throughout lunchtime and served the best Eggs Benedicts, Canard Confits and Quiche Lorraines you could possibly find in Malaysia (if you disagree, let me know and we can go to said best French restaurant together). On top of our mains, we finished our lunch with a sublime Crème Brulée, better than most that I tasted in Paris. 

To end this post, I’m going to ask you to do one thing:

Go. To. Yeast.  

7.9; 1.27 a.m. 
Note to self: although minced garlic mixed with soy sauce tastes great with any Chinese dish (except pork ribs glazed with dragonfruit-Marmite sauce), please restrain from eating too much next time.  
Now my breath reeks of garlic. When will this ordeal end? I. Do not. Know. #prayforshaun#hashtagsdontdoshit
UPDATE: it lasted the whole of the day after (fml)

 

4.9: A bookshop called I AM LEJEN

While waiting for King who was late for our lunch appointment, I spent some time at I AM LEJEN
 

I AM LEJEN is a boutique bookstore that sells novels written by our very own Malaysian writers, alongside I AM LEJEN mugs, t-shirts, hoodies and retro football jerseys. Just opposite of Gold Chilli in SS15, its eye-catching signboard will make you pause and muse…

“What the hell kind of shop name is that?”

I met Hafiz the shopkeeper, who proceeded to give me a tour of the shop and a few brief explanations on what the bestsellers were about. We then sat on the cushy beanbags provided, and chatted about our lives in university.

Hafiz was a really friendly host, and treated I AM LEJEN as though it was a hidden gem in the student centre of SS15. We talked about the bookstore and all that it offered, from Malay poetry to translated English blockbuster novels such as The Fault In Our Stars. While this was happening, a television hanging above the cashier’s head was playing a live theatre act of a local bestselling novel called Awek Chuck Taylors. Here’s a short sinopsis from Goodreads:

Mengisahkan kisah seorang mamat bernama Hafiz, yang bertemu dengan seorang gadis hipster anarkis yang bernama Mira. Pertemuan ini mencetuskan beberapa ledakan aneurysm kepada korteks serebrum – serta perhubungan dengan adik beradik Mira – Aiman dan Nana – yang menjadi semakin akrab. Dan keakraban itu mencetuskan satu lagi cinta tiga segi Illuminati antara Hafiz dan adik beradik – Mira dan Nana. 

I bought two books: Love in Penang, and Lost in Putrajaya (UPDATE: so far REALLY good!). Flipped one of the books and saw ‘Timothy Nakayama’ written in the list of authors. Tim’s a great friend of mine whom I had met during my Toastmasters days. Always a person who cuts through the noise (in speech evaluations), and does it so coolly. The same applies to his speeches. In essence, he’s a chaser of his own dreams. You don’t find many people like him nowadays.  

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At lunch, I made a new friend. His name is Theeban. Being 6 ft 4, muscular and friendly, you know he would make a great bouncer; but what really impressed me is that he recently started reading books; books about history; books that a minute fraction of Malaysians enjoy reading; books recommended by his girlfriend. What a gentleman! 

It’s definitely a book day today.